Tolu Frimpong reveals how debt can crush confidence but inspires with tips to reclaim self-worth and rise above finances.
Debt can be a heavy burden, not just on your finances but on your mental and emotional well-being as well.
It’s easy to get trapped in negative self-talk and feel like your financial situation defines who you are. If you’ve ever been in debt, you may have noticed how it starts to chip away at your confidence, self-worth, and overall view of yourself.
It’s important to recognise how debt affects your self-esteem, but equally crucial to remember that your value isn’t tied to your bank balance or your financial mistakes.
Let’s break down the impact debt can have on your self-esteem and, more importantly, how you can rebuild it.
1. Loss of confidence in your abilities
One of the first ways debt can hurt your self-esteem is by diminishing your confidence in your abilities. When you’re struggling with debt, it’s easy to feel like you’re failing in an area of your life.
Financial difficulties can make you doubt your competence and question whether you’re capable of managing other aspects of your life. These thoughts can quickly spiral into a belief that you’re just not good enough, creating a barrier to success in both personal and professional areas.
2. Lack of trust in yourself
Debt can lead to feelings of regret and self-blame, especially if the debt is the result of poor financial decisions. This lack of trust in yourself can erode your sense of self-worth.
When you look back on past decisions, you may be hard on yourself for mistakes like overspending, poor budgeting, or taking on more debt than you could handle. This constant self-criticism only deepens the belief that you can’t be trusted to make good choices, perpetuating a negative cycle of self-doubt.
3. Constantly beating yourself up for past mistakes
When you’re in debt, it’s common to focus on the mistakes you’ve made that led to the situation. Whether it’s high-interest credit cards, loans that were taken on without thinking about the long-term impact, or overspending on non-essential items, these past financial missteps can haunt you.
The guilt and shame can cause you to obsess over your mistakes, making it even harder to move forward. But it’s crucial to recognise that these past decisions don’t define you. Mistakes are a part of life, and they offer opportunities to learn and grow.
4. Anxiety about how to repay the debt
One of the biggest emotional tolls debt can take is anxiety. The worry about how to pay off your debt and the consequences of not repaying it can keep you up at night. You might worry about things like late fees, missed payments, or what will happen if you can’t pay your debt off in time.
This anxiety can become overwhelming, especially if you’re juggling multiple debts at once. It’s easy to get trapped in a cycle of stress, but it’s important to understand that worrying about the future doesn’t help the present.
5. Seeing yourself as less than others
Debt can also make you feel inferior to others. You might feel like you’re the only one making financial mistakes, and as a result, you start comparing yourself to others who seem to have their finances in order.
This can lead to feelings of isolation, as though you’re alone in your struggles, and cause you to undervalue yourself. But remember, everyone has their own financial journey, and many people have made mistakes and faced setbacks along the way. Debt doesn’t make you less than anyone else.
6. Withdrawing from loved ones
As debt takes a toll on your mental health, you might find yourself withdrawing from friends and family. You may fear being judged or perceived as “broke,” which can be embarrassing or shameful.
You might worry that people will view you negatively or think less of you. However, keeping your struggles to yourself only isolates you further and makes it harder to seek support. Opening up to someone you trust can be incredibly freeing and can help you feel less alone in your journey.
You are not your debt
It’s important to remember that you are not defined by your debt. Debt is a temporary financial challenge, not an irreversible part of your identity. You made some financial mistakes, but that doesn’t mean you are a mistake.
Every setback is an opportunity for growth. While it might feel overwhelming right now, this situation is temporary and does not define your future.
Your wealth does not equate to your value, and neither does your debt. You are enough as you are, with or without money. You are worthy of respect, love, and success, no matter where you stand financially.
Tolu is a Money Coach and Content Creator, passionate about helping others break the payday-to-payday cycle and achieve their financial goals, through the power of intentional budgeting, saving and investing. When she’s not talking about money you can find her spending time with her 3 boisterous boys.